Listening to one of my favorite singers, Chaka Khan, as I begin this blog.
‘Whatcha gonna do for me?’
Realizing that this song is nearly 40 years old as I muse and reminisce. It’s easy to call out the ego on simply the title to this song---as our egos are taught from our earliest beginnings that ‘life is hard’ and that ‘there’s no such thing as a free lunch’. ‘Look out for number one’. Unless your mentors, aka parents, were living in a spiritual community without the patriarchal overlord, we all would do well to deconstruct our egos in order to allow the soul’s light in.
‘It’s all in a day’s work/trying’ hard to defend/the time that I spend alone”
Recognize that it is through being alone and/or hitting rock bottom that our egos begin to ask different questions. You might be thinking that we are back in week 1 and 2 (Mentors & Music), but this blog is about Wholeness. It is often through music that our egos will relax and let some soul’s truth be illuminated. Don’t know about you, but my family will tell you that I get looped in a set of tunes that can be difficult to break. (Praise be to Black Jesus for earbuds!)
Know this: In order to become whole and experience this Zen/Not Zen manner of living moment to moment, the ego requires deconstruction, transformation and reconstruction with a solid bridge to the soul. That’s an ideal path to Wholeness (Week 12).
Yet, in some of worse ego states, food can be a hindrance. What starts off as an extra slice of cake can become the whole cake. The more imbalanced the soul-ego scale becomes, the more you repress/suppress your feelings in the physical body. Habits to keep the soul talk from reaching your ego increase.
Know this: the soul speaks through our feelings, the goosebumps, seemingly random daydreams. You feel. Your soul and ego each have an opinion of what works for every situation. Awaring around each perspective is the heart of the ORM practice. An imbalanced ego has impatience, FOMO (Fear Or Missing Out)---which is usually based upon YOLO (You Only Live Once). It not only has you pay a toll to the Bridge Over Troubled Waters to the Soul, but it closes. Usually the ego sets up distractions like Google Maps sending you the wrong instructions. Half truths abound.
Until you’re able to live with your Ignorance (week 4), you miss out on opportunities to have and offer compassion, not only to yourself, but to others. For example, after two royal and whole circles aka ORM Seasons, I no longer find myself getting frustrated at slow drivers. First, I look to see if they are from another state, if so, I breathe and wish them well in finding their destination. Now, when they are from Missouri it may take two breaths or more---lol.
After my ego determines and accepts that it knows very little, relaxation happens---a chillax, as it were. I can create the space from the lost driver, mate, friend or family members. The more we have invested in our closest relationships, the more we are less likely to breathe and create space for them. Usually this means we haven’t made space for our own ignorance of what we truly feel. Therefore, our Emotions in Week Five are a major creative point on the ORM Whole Royal circle. It is through the deliberate breathing, feeling and clearing throughout our physical body that we can accept ourselves in Wholeness. Wholeness helps establish intentional boundaries (that hopefully you aligned with last week---11 Aligning With Intention). In an ideal world, you would do this work every week in natural order, but recognizing the power of the entire system when each subject presents allows the space for you to do whichever week’s work whenever you want.
Know this: our souls exist outside of time and space. Creating the space to listen to our souls can make all the difference between enjoying your loved ones’ company or not. Many times we’ve been taught that to be a protector means fixing the problem. Sometimes all anyone wants is to feel heard. Love listens. Power demands. Can you feel which one sits uneasily against ego?
Ideally we would have the time to listen to those we love from the perspective of Soul/Ego Balance. But we can become easily confused wondering whether we value being over doing, or vice versa? Revisiting Values & Ideals week would be helpful. You can make a Values & Ideals list at any given time within any week, for any area of your life. ORM presents in a linear fashion, but it inspires the infinite rhythm of the circle. Within Wholeness, you begin to feel the spirals---within, without and all over. You feel transformed on a subatomic level. Your body hums with anticipation. Sure, you’ll still get drawn into egocentric drama, but instead of setting up shop there, you visit. You leave. You visit your turbulent feelings that can cause Conflict (Week 8) which hopefully leads to creating clearer Intentions, you search for Resources (Week 10) that you aid your Alignment with Intentions (Week 11) ---the big picture shows up like the clouds opening up to sunny days. The soul is the Sun---central, ever present and illuminating.
In a way that only Chaka can, she delivers these lyrics:
’’strange as it seems/you make your own dreams come true’.
Through Wholeness you feel these lyrics as real and true. Imagine every 12 weeks experiencing these self-evident truths, not in theory, but in practice. Ideals scream ‘perfection’; Values whispers ‘You and your soul got this’.
The Bridge Over Troubled Feelings has been fully constructed, no tolls and your road is clear.
Wholeness, like moving on a circle, is never ending. However, the rewards become increasingly sweeter as your grasp of the material evolves. Even when your ego wants to draw you back into some form of lunacy or another, you will laugh at the ridiculousness that you ever believed that you wouldn’t be. As long as you have a physical body, there is a distinct probability that you’ll get frustrated, angry or mad at yourself or someone else - more than once. That’s why Values & Ideals (Week 7) is such an important lesson. I intend ‘joy’ on Fridays. I value ‘harmony’. Ideally, I wish everyone else did too. Innocently, I place my soul’s energies on these two things and usually my Fridays are a thing of beauty---well, they are becoming so as my practice deepens my ability to manifest the things I align with intention.
That Bridge Over Troubled Waters takes us home. Everyone has a place. Wholeness creates the space for acceptance of our different Values & Ideals. Wholeness demonstrates love in Conflict. Wholeness gives us Intentions of unity, peace and compassion. Intentions can feel like a choir where multiple voices sound as one. Wholeness wants you to fall in love with your newly reconstructed self. Wholeness shows a way. Wholeness says ‘If I can do it, so can you’. Our souls clears a path from tolerance to acceptance to coexistence. Wholeness elucidates the way our souls speak through ‘so-called’ coincidences. Wholeness the breath of life and cooling waters of the soul become synonymous. Wholeness feeds our egos a larger and deeper vision of how we can better treat ourselves and others. Worst case scenarios begin to hold less and less sway over our (re)actions. Wholeness wants us to live as much as possible in a response mode---after all it is called response-ability, not react-ability. The prodigal son story is about the ego returning home.
A new world of happiness (based on nothing but a significant change in attitude) turns us around. As we recognize our soul as a purposeful force in our lives, we coexist with it in increasing increments. Our soul rides shotgun on our journey. Our soul sits at any conscious pit stops we make as if we were NASCAR drivers. Our soul is there when we need it and we do not need it, no matter how much awareness we direct its way.
Need a quick hack for daily soul connection? Use your intention. When we intend Wholeness, our empty spaces look to be filled with something more powerful than the negativity that collects without intention. Any vacancies prodded by ego will be filled with acceptance, joy and peace. Love illuminates coexistence with other whole beings---healed, healthy and harmonious. What an ideal!